Dog blog # 5: Bumsliding and falling out of your pants...

I have a friend who has a special term called bumsliding – a description for her toddler’s little wiggle on his bum across the floor. This term means something entirely different in our house.

Bumsliding is a warning we use when ascending and descending stairs with a boisterous Labrador in the house. Libby likes to lead from the front. That means, cutting in front of you like a crazed taxi-driver without indicating, taking the most direct route from A-B, cutting corners and pulling handbrake turns whenever she feels like it. This behaviour has led to numerous near-death bumsliding episodes down the stairs.

Most recent incident:

This resulted in embarrassment, carpet burns and lots of yelling. Contact lenses removed for the night - too cool to wear nerdy glasses, which incidentally have also been chewed by dog and are unable to do a nose perch so well anymore  - check. Also the mistake of wearing husband’s tracksuit pants (four sizes too big) meant that cream coloured Labrador successfully camouflaged with the beige carpet, resulting in unexpected tumble down the stairs.

Would not have been half as bad if stairs, dog and pants could figure out how to manage the process, but as luck would have it, something had to give. I super surfed down the stairs and landed in a tumble at the bottom of the stairs. Now, don’t snigger at the word bottom - because I ended up blind as a bat, minus pants and bum in the air.

Libby took advantage of free pants and dashed off. Husband on the couch, was very helpful in yelling pointers and GPS coordinates as to which direction dog and pants were last seen.  

Human down...get pants!

Near naked wife, yelling, covering up exposed bits and shouting… not so amused. Husband however, was quite pleased with the performance and managed to send wife running in useless circles for extended period of time.

Track suit pants…in the freak'n dustbin...